It happens all the time. At some point every girl I know has been a back burner afterthought. It’s fucking garbage and needs to end right now. I know it’s difficult to admit, but it’s time to get real.
If he doesn’t invite you to do things, he doesn’t really like you. If the majority of your interactions are unplanned and you just happen to be at the same place at the same time, either he’s a stalker or you are. Stop positioning yourself into his routine. You clearly aren’t his first choice. More importantly, why would you ever want that?
Yes, I know some guys are insecure and afraid of rejection and just can’t get it together enough to ask us out. It happens. They want to spend time with us, but can’t handle the possibility of the word no, so they just show up. But really, do you want that guy in your life? The guy who won’t ask you to put your finger in his butt, but will cheat with some hoe anyway, because we all know the butt thing isn’t going away? No. Nobody wants that guy. So just stop. Stay home. Or go out with your friends. Go do something that leaves no opportunity to run into him. If he wanted to see you, he would ask to see you.
Hold up, Ladies. We’re not getting off that easy. The same is true for women. If we’re going to get all preachy about equality, we need to start acting that way. We need to feel the slight twinge of nervousness, the disappointment of rejection, and it’s time to set our standby guys free. Let them pursue someone who actually sees value in their existence and who isn’t just looking for leftovers at 2am. It’s time to step up and be the guy we want to date. We need to set the example and grow a pair. So ask him. And if he declines, move the fuck on. Do not continue to pursue mediocrity. It doesn’t matter how much you like him, if he doesn’t like you equally as much, it’s broken. You will always be an option and never a priority and that’s no fucking way to live.